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Xavier Llewellyn (in-universe): Difference between revisions

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Xavier Llewellyn read half of ''[[The Noodle Incident (in-universe)|The Noodle Incident]]'' on their smartphone whilst sitting on a sofa. Offended that [[Arcbeatle Press (in-universe)|Arcbeatle Press]] failed to ask them to write a story, they firstly pivoted to thinking positively about the publishing group as they didn't want their initial thoughts of hate to remove any chance of future opportunities and to not get into "legal trouble", before plotting to write a "[[The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”... (in-universe)|revenge fanfiction]]". Their concentration was broken by a stream of incoming messages on [[Discord]] from fans and writers of ''The Noodle Incident,'' all with suggestions; the [[Plummiest of the Puddings]], for one, approved of Xavier's usage of [[Noodle Man]] without actually licensing the character.
Xavier Llewellyn read half of ''[[The Noodle Incident (in-universe)|The Noodle Incident]]'' on their smartphone whilst sitting on a sofa. Offended that [[Arcbeatle Press (in-universe)|Arcbeatle Press]] failed to ask them to write a story, they firstly pivoted to thinking positively about the publishing group as they didn't want their initial thoughts of hate to remove any chance of future opportunities and to not get into "legal trouble", before plotting to write a "[[The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”... (in-universe)|revenge fanfiction]]". Their concentration was broken by a stream of incoming messages on [[Discord]] from fans and writers of ''The Noodle Incident,'' all with suggestions; the [[Plummiest of the Puddings]], for one, approved of Xavier's usage of [[Noodle Man]] without actually licensing the character.


After this digression temporarily broke through the fourth wall, the universe Xavier inhabited and the universe in which you were reading this synced up and became confusing, thus Xavier began to make things up as they went along, contemplating adding in a joke about [[Ryan (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|Ryan]] and his [[Alan (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|sentient roulette wheel Alan]] who read fan wikis, but they decided against it. Attempting to end their "crappy metafiction", and to stop writing the fanfiction and their plan of "vindictive vindictiveness", Xavier focused on one goal: to kill [[Noodle Man]].
After this digression temporarily broke through the fourth wall, the universe Xavier inhabited and the universe in which you were reading this synced up and became confusing, thus Xavier began to make things up as they went along, contemplating adding in a joke about [[Ryan (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|Ryan]] and his [[Alan (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|sentient roulette wheel Alan]] who read fan wikis, but they decided against it. Attempting to end their "crappy metafiction", and to stop writing the fanfiction and their plan of "vindictive vindictiveness" at the same time, Xavier focused on one goal: to kill [[Noodle Man]].


Xavier lured Noodle Man to their universe by repeatedly jumping up and down on the contents of a [[Pot Noodle]] which Xavier claimed was [[Noode Wife]], all while calmly (and totally not angrily) goading, insulting and throwing obscenities at him; Noodle Man entered the universe as a pile of wet [[noodle]]s that fell to the floor, as Xavier sanely grinned maniacally. While Noodle Man extended a hand in good will, Xavier beat him with a blender before proceeding to jump up and down, once again, on Noodle Man's fedora. Xavier told Noodle Man to "respectfully [...] go f*ck himself" as they spun Noodle Man around and plunged his head into a pan of boiling water they had prepared early, severing Noodle Man's head with a knife all while blocking out the pain of their own hand being burned in the process.
Xavier lured Noodle Man to their universe by repeatedly jumping up and down on the contents of a [[Pot Noodle]] which Xavier claimed was [[Noodle Wife]], all while calmly (and totally not angrily) goading, insulting and throwing obscenities at him; Noodle Man entered the universe as a pile of wet [[noodle]]s that fell to the floor, as Xavier sanely grinned maniacally. While Noodle Man extended a hand in good will, Xavier beat him with a blender before proceeding to jump up and down, once again, on Noodle Man's fedora. Xavier told Noodle Man to "respectfully [...] go f*ck himself" as they spun Noodle Man around and plunged his head into a pan of boiling water they had prepared early, severing Noodle Man's head with a knife all while blocking out the pain of their own hand being burned in the process.


As Noodle Man's head floated in the water, Xavier spat at it and condemned him for not saying "IT'S NOODLE TIME" and noodling everywhere and making a noodbillion dollars. Xavier then took Noodle Man's head off the boil and prepared it with a [[sweet and sour sauce]] and [[faux-egg]] as the adrenaline left their body. Xavier then awoke from a nap after their meal to a pain in their chest, watching in horror as blood seeped into their occult graphic t-shirt, their body then convulsing in pain until their brain shut off as their chest erupted with a geyser of bloodied noodles.
As Noodle Man's head floated in the water, Xavier spat at it and condemned him for not saying "IT'S NOODLE TIME" and noodling everywhere and making a noodbillion dollars. Xavier then took Noodle Man's head off the boil and prepared it with a [[sweet and sour sauce]] and [[faux-egg]] as the adrenaline left their body. Xavier then awoke from a nap after their meal to a pain in their chest, watching in horror as blood seeped into their occult graphic t-shirt, their body then convulsing in pain until their brain shut off as their chest erupted with a geyser of bloodied noodles.
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