The Frost King's Treasure (novel): Difference between revisions

| featuring= [[The Frost King]]<br>[[SERIAL CODE 000000234]]<br>[[Frederick]]<br>[[Tpxszum]]<br>[[Alistair Neezley]]<br>[[Volensholagoz]]<br>[[Celebration-665]]<br>[[Santa Claus]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Philatel-426]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Larrikin-1029]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Lord Thymon]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Pseudo-Pessimist]]<br>[[Mail Delivery Cupid (The Frost King's Treasure)|Unnamed Mail Delivery Cupid]]<br>[[The Early Bird]]<br>[[The Metafictional Macaw]]<br>[[Madame Tarsa]]<br>[[Mechanical Fortune Teller|The Mechanical Fortune Teller]]<br>[[Radluhac ag-Wampyr]]<br>[[Sellane ag-Narra]]<br>[[Karshassinwellshkhan III]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Sympus ag-Forgos]]<br>[[Skollops ag-Warka]]<br>[[Forga sog-Forgos]]<br>[[Captain (Peace and Quiet)|Four-armed robot]]<br>[[The Ancient One]]<br>[[21-419]]<br>[[Old man (The Frost King's Treasure)|Unnamed old man]]<br>[[Sifiye]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Whorrop]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Doctor Curious]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Queen of the Black Market]]<br><small>(mentioned)</small>

[[Tpxszum]] and [[Frederick]] are hard at work preparing the [[Interdimensional Tavern]] for its annual [[Christmas]]-esque party, whose celebrations and decorations are a mash-up of traditions from similar-but-distinct holidays from across [[the Multiverse]]. Taking a break in the staff room, they are startled by the appearance of [[Alistair Neezley]], who shows them a parcel which showed up at the Tavern's door. It speaks of “[[the Frost King]]'s treasure”, apparently available in “[[The Frost King's Realm|a place]] where it's snowy all year”, complete with a set of coordinates. Neezley, who read about this treasure a few months ago in “a book about the Multiverse’s greatest treasures”. After getting [[Volensholagoz]]'s permission, the trio thus fly off towards those coordinates aboard [[Alistair Neezley's Void Ship]].  

In the [[Cupid Homeworld]], too, everything is festive; while the [[Crew of the Copper-Colored Cupids]]' authorities refuse to authorise human-style [[Christmas]] celebrations, [[Celebration-665]] has routed around this by inventing a Cupid-specific [[Festival of Giving]] to be celebrated around the same time of year. [[Dandy-432]] has been getting into the spirit of the season, importing a pine tree from the [[Prime Universe|Prime]] [[Earth (Prime Universe)|Earth]] and putting it up in the [[Blue Feather]]'s wing of the [[Department of Postal Services' building]]. After failing to convince [[Pessimist-242]] to share in his festive cheer, he decides to try and find [[Larrikin-1029]] to complete a carol-singing quartet before tonight, but instead stumbles into a [[Mail Delivery Cupid (The Frost King's Treasure)|Mail Delivery Cupid]] who gives him a latter similarly urging him to go on a quest for [[the Frost King]]'s Treasure. He immediately decides to accept it, and pressures Pessimist into accompanying him.

In their [[Time Sewers|own home base]], the [[Collective of the Retconning Crocodiles]] consult three fortune-telling birds they have in a veiled cage. One of them, [[the Metafictional Macaw]], informs them that there has been “a disturbance in the format”: the ongoing narrative is a serial instead of a one-shot. The Macaw tells them of the formula of the last few Parts, and is able to recite the message and coordinates for them, even though they didn't yet receive an invitation of their own. The Crocodiles initially have no interest in mere material wealth, but when the Macaw describes [[the Frost King]]'s treasure as “a [[MacGuffin]]”, they become interested in its narrative power, and resolve to get it before anyone.

In [[Manik]] in [[the Frost King's Realm]], the arrival of [[Alistair Neezley's Void Ship]] is witnessed by an [[Old man (The Frost King's Treasure)|old man]] from the local village, whose mind is preoccupied with the imminent [[Raenn]] festivities. When [[Alistair Neezley|Neezley]], [[Tpxszum]] and [[Frederick]] inquire about the old legend of [[the Frost King]]'s treasure, he gives them a broad direction, pointing at the distant mountains where it is reputedly hidden, but advises them against attempting the climb unprepared. Naturally, they press on anyway, and the old man resumes walking home, thinking no more of the strange travellers — little realising that many more just like them are arriving even then…

Behind the doorway is a second flight of stairs, made of ice, which takes the treasure-seekers up to the crater at the top of the mountain, in the centre of which stands a huge ice throne. The figure sat atop it soon reveals himself to be, not [[the Frost King]], but none other than the Cupids' old foe [[Darius]]. He explains that after he ran out of money and was kicked out of the [[Interdimensional Tavern]], he was picked up by [[Doctor Curious]] and managed to steal his [[Doctor Curious's Void Ship|Void Ship]], only to accidentally crash it here, where it was all he could do to use a smaller interdimensional transporter Curious kept on his ship to send the invitations through the [[Interdimensional Post Office]]; he planned to send them to everyone he wanted revenge on, from Pessimist, whom he considers his most personal archenemy, to the Crocodiles, who escaped from his laboratory so long ago. He also rounded off the list with the [[Wellsian]]s in whom he had a purely scientific interest, having heard people discussing them at the Tavern after reading ''[[The War of the Worlds]]'', and subsequently grown curious.

However, after he reaches the end of his monologue, it becomes clear that he had no particular plan for dealing with his foes after luring them here, and they easily overpower the demented bactrian. The treasure-seekers are left pondering whether the promised treasure even existed, only for Dandy to slip and fall against one of the legs of the huge ice throne; he collapses it, revealing a hidden chamber ''under'' the throne, filled with the promised wealth. The fighting is about to resume when Pessmist, warring against his every instinct, delivers a touching speech about Christmas, peace and truces, convincing everyone that there is enough treasure to go around. In the end, everyone selects an appropriate gift from the treasure before going home with no further conflict — and everyone thus ends up reasonably happy, even the Gorillas, who found an old abandoned research facility in Antarctica which proves suitable to being turned into a new secret base. The one exception is of course [[the Frost King]] himself, who is somewhat bemused to find his treasure substantially depleted when he returns to his mountain after everybody's departure.