Xavier Llewellyn (in-universe)

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Xavier Llewellyn
Character Information
Died	2024
Species	Human
Residence	Earth, unnamed universe
Occupation	Writer
Behind the Scenes
First seen in	PROSE: The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”, 2024: 2 Noodle, 2 Furious 2, The Electric Boogaloo, feat. the Piscons, Jenny Everywhere and the People’ Republic of China
Also seen in	PROSE: Another Day, Another Ludicrous Universe

In one universe, Xavier Llewellyn was a writer who attempted to murder Noodle Man in revenge after Arcbeatle Press didn't ask them to write a story for The Noodle Incident. While Xavier did successfully kill Noodle Man, Second Noodle Man II was reborn from inside Xavier, killing the writer in the process.

Description

Physical appearance

Xavier wore an occult graphic t-shirt. (PROSE: The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”, 2024: 2 Noodle, 2 Furious 2, The Electric Boogaloo, feat. the Piscons, Jenny Everywhere and the People’ Republic of China)

Personality

Xavier was vengeful, spiteful and vindictive, bloodthirsty and violent. They were probably insane and maniacal. They even openly and indiscriminately insulted people who, for no benefit of their own, sought to help them. They were conscious of ensuring their own personal gain, attempting to feign emotions to trick people. Their behaviour was also contradictory, respectfully and politely shouting and provoking people. (PROSE: The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”, 2024: 2 Noodle, 2 Furious 2, The Electric Boogaloo, feat. the Piscons, Jenny Everywhere and the People’ Republic of China) Jenny Everywhere considered their behaviour to be "pathetic". (PROSE: Another Day, Another Ludicrous Universe)

Biography

Xavier Llewellyn read half of The Noodle Incident on their smartphone whilst sitting on a sofa. Offended that Arcbeatle Press failed to ask them to write a story, they firstly pivoted to thinking positively about the publishing group as they didn't want their initial thoughts of hate to remove any chance of future opportunities and to not get into "legal trouble", before plotting to write a "revenge fanfiction". Their concentration was broken by a stream of incoming messages on Discord from fans and writers of The Noodle Incident, all with suggestions; the Plummiest of the Puddings, for one, approved of Xavier's usage of Noodle Man without actually licensing the character.

After this digression temporarily broke through the fourth wall, the universe Xavier inhabited and the universe in which you were reading this synced up and became confusing, thus Xavier began to make things up as they went along, contemplating adding in a joke about Ryan and his sentient roulette wheel Alan who read fan wikis, but they decided against it. Attempting to end their "crappy metafiction", and to stop writing the fanfiction and their plan of "vindictive vindictiveness", Xavier focused on one goal: to kill Noodle Man.

Xavier lured Noodle Man to their universe by repeatedly jumping up and down on the contents of a Pot Noodle which Xavier claimed was Noode Wife, all while calmly (and totally not angrily) goading, insulting and throwing obscenities at him; Noodle Man entered the universe as a pile of wet noodles that fell to the floor, as Xavier sanely grinned maniacally. While Noodle Man extended a hand in good will, Xavier beat him with a blender before proceeding to jump up and down, once again, on Noodle Man's fedora. Xavier told Noodle Man to "respectfully [...] go f*ck himself" as they spun Noodle Man around and plunged his head into a pan of boiling water they had prepared early, severing Noodle Man's head with a knife all while blocking out the pain of their own hand being burned in the process.

As Noodle Man's head floated in the water, Xavier spat at it and condemned him for not saying "IT'S NOODLE TIME" and noodling everywhere and making a noodbillion dollars. Xavier then took Noodle Man's head off the boil and prepared it with a sweet and sour sauce and faux-egg as the adrenaline left their body. Xavier then awoke from a nap after their meal to a pain in their chest, watching in horror as blood seeped into their occult graphic t-shirt, their body then convulsing in pain until their brain shut off as their chest erupted with a geyser of bloodied noodles.

Second Noodle Man II was reborn. Yet, at that exact same time, a freak gamma-ray burst from another galaxy collided with Earth and ended all life, (PROSE: The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”, 2024: 2 Noodle, 2 Furious 2, The Electric Boogaloo, feat. the Piscons, Jenny Everywhere and the People’ Republic of China) the surface of the world churning with fire and lava, with any trace of humanity being erased. However, a single noodle survived, as witnessed by one Jenny Everywhere from within the Infinite. Jenny thought that the universe itself wanted to end Xavier's bullsh*t. (PROSE: Another Day, Another Ludicrous Universe)

Behind the scenes

"Xavier Llewellyn" was, of course, an in-universe counterpart of the real world writer of the stories that featured them.