View source for The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”... (short story)

{{CW|detail=comic violence}}
{{DISPLAYTITLE:''The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”, 2024: 2 Noodle, 2 Furious 2, The Electric Boogaloo, feat. the Piscons, Jenny Everywhere and the People’ Republic of China'' (short story)}}
{{Short Story
|title1        = ''The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”, 2024: 2 Noodle, 2 Furious 2, The Electric Boogaloo, feat. the Piscons, Jenny Everywhere and the People’ Republic of China''
|image1        = 
|hero(es)      = [[The Noodle Man]]
|villain(s)    = [[Xavier Llewellyn (in-universe)|Xavier Llewellyn]]
|featuring     = [[Aristide Twain (in-universe)|Aristide Twain]] <small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Plummiest of the Puddings]] <small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Ryan (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|Ryan]] <small>(mentioned)</small><br> [[Alan (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|Alan]] <small>(mentioned)</small><br> [[Noodle Wife]] <small>(mentioned)</small><br>[[Second Noodle Man II]]
|setting       = [[Earth (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|Earth]], [[Universe (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|unnamed universe]]
|length        = 1,324 words
|writer(s)     = [[Xavier Llewellyn]]
|dates         = 24 July 2024
|original_link = [https://archiveofourown.org/works/57637321]
|seriesnav     = [[Xavier Llewellyn]] stories
|previous      = ''[[Jenny Everywhere in: The Unofficial and Now Just Plainly Annoyingly Titled Sequel to... (short story)|Jenny Everywhere in: The Unofficial and Now Just Plainly Annoyingly Titled Sequel to "Jenny Everywhere and the Even More Annoyingly-Titled Sequel to "Jenny Everywhere and the Rather Annoyingly Titled Sequel to "Jenny Everywhere and the Very Short Story"""]]''
|next          = ''[[Another Day, Another Ludicrous Universe (short story)|Another Day, Another Ludicrous Universe]]''
}}
'''''The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”, 2024: 2 Noodle, 2 Furious 2, The Electric Boogaloo, feat. the Piscons, Jenny Everywhere and the People’ Republic of China''''' was a short story written by [[Xavier Llewellyn]] which served as an unofficial sequel to [[Arcbeatle Press]]' [[April Fools' Day (real world)|April Fools' Day]] anthology ''[[The Noodle Incident (anthology)|The Noodle Incident]]''. It was released on [[24 July (releases)|24 July]] [[2024 (releases)|2024]].

Despite referencing the Piscons, [[Jenny Everywhere]] and the People'<sup>[sic]</sup> Republic of China in the title, none of these characters/groups appear directly in the story.

== Contents ==
=== Plot ===
Sitting on a sofa, [[Xavier Llewellyn (in-universe)|Xavier Llewellyn]] — without finishing ''[[The Noodle Incident (in-universe)|The Noodle Incident]]'' — becomes embittered after having not been asked by [[Arcbeatle Press (in-universe)|Arcbeatle Press]] to contribute. Closing the e-book on their smartphone, they begin to fume about Arcbeatle before stopping themself, not wanting to get into legal trouble; they quickly pivot to think positive opinions of the publishers. Deciding to write a "[[The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”... (in-universe)|revenge fanfiction]]", they get distracted by messages on [[Discord]] from fans and writers of ''The Noodle Incident'', breaking Xavier's concentration so much the perspective of the story shifts and bleeds out of the fourth wall.

After things go back to normal — or as much as they could in such a setting — Xavier's story syncs up with the real world story and the relationship between Xavier's universe and the real world reaches the point where it becomes confusing. So Xavier begins making things up as they go along, considering adding a joke about [[Ryan (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|a man named Ryan]] and his [[Alan (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|sentient, omnipotent roulette wheel named Alan]] who traverse fan wikis, but decides not to.

Ceasing their "crappy metafiction" and abandoning concocting a "deathly plan of vindictive vindictiveness" and their writing of a revenge fanfiction, Xavier decides to kill [[the Noodle Man]].

Understanding that their universe is a part of the [[multiverse]], Xavier retrieves a [[Pot Noodle]] from a cupboard and begins stomping on the contents to summon the Noodle Man, all whilst calmly shouting, cursing and insulting the Noodle Man. Their ploy appears to work as a pile of wet noodles materialises in Xavier's universe, which then forms the Noodle Man. Xavier maniacally smiles, completely sanely.

The Noodle Man amiably raises his noodly arm in good faith to Xavier, but they whack it with a blender which knocks the fedora off the Noodle Man's head. Xavier begins jumping up and down on that too. Telling the Noodle Man — respectfully — to go "f*ck himself" and that he underestimates their power and hatred, they grab him by head, smashing it against a wall, then by the trenchcoat, spinning around and plunging the Noodle Man's head into a pre-prepared pan of boiling water. Xavier resists the pain of the heat as they sever the Noodle Man's head, then spits on it.

:: "''And you didn't even F*CKING say ‘IT'S NOODLE TIME’ and noodled all over the place and made a noodbillion dollars! Talk about a missed opportunity!''"

As the adrenaline dissipates, Xavier finishes boiling the Noodle Man's head, garnished it and then eating it. This has an unexpected effect, however, as Xavier begins to convulse in pain as an ominous pool of blood seeps into their t-shirt and they feel a pressure from the inside of their chest — it ruptures to a fountain of bloodied noodles, a regenerated Noodle Man — [[Second Noodle Man II]]. However, just as Second Noodle Man II introduces himself to the world, a gamma-ray burst hits [[Earth (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|Earth]] and decimates all life.

=== Worldbuilding ===
==== Universes ====
* Xavier lives in [[Universe (The Non-Canonical, Unlicensed and Non-Valid Sequel to Arcbeatle Press’(s) April Fool's Anthology “The Noodle Incident”...)|an unnamed universe]], or, possibly, a timeline — "people" can't decide on the terminology, without even considering the terms "reality" and "dimension".
** This universe ''isn't'' the real world of the readers, but as the [[multiverse]] exists, technically every universe is a "real world".
** This universe is also not the [[Third Universe]], none of the [[10,000 Dawns]], the [[WARS universe|''WARS'' universe]], or any of the other universes seen in ''The Noodle Incident''.

==== Fiction ====
* In this universe, ''[[The Noodle Incident (in-universe)|The Noodle Incident]]'' is an anthology published by [[Arcbeatle Press (in-universe)|Arcbeatle Press]] in 2024 and written by [[Aristide Twain (in-universe)|Aristide Twain]]. Xavier thinks the anthology is "fantastic", grievances aside.
* Xavier considers if the "loyal" readers of Arcbeatle Press were "unfairly shafted" when they didn't release a free e-book on their website as a physical book on the "infamous" [[Amazon|amazon.com]], concluding that the readers weren't.
** Xavier did check, finding only a book titled ''[[The Naughty Noodle Incident]]'' that was illustrated with [[artificial intelligence|AI]] "artwork".
* The [[Plummiest of the Puddings]] approves of Xavier's usage of the Noodle Man in their revenge fanfiction without technically ''licensing'' the Noodle Man.
* Xavier's reference to his power and hatred of the Noodle Man is an homage to ''[[Star Wars]]''.
* Xavier also references ''[[Morbius (film)|Morbius]]''.

==== Individuals ====
* Xavier, to provoke the Noodle Man, claims that the Pot Noodle they were stomping on was [[Noodle Wife]].

==== Food and drink ====
* The Noodle Man is made out of [[noodle]]s. His voice even sounds like his mouth is full of noodles.
* Xavier's temper "bubbl[es] like a pot of boiling noodles that had been forgotten about by its cooker, who had decided to make ''real'' food, such as [[Spam]] and [[cheese slice]]s and [[sausage]]s."
* Xavier garnishes the Noodle Man's head with [[sweet and sour sauce]] and [[faux-egg]].

=== Continuity ===
* [[PROSE]]: ''[[Another Day, Another Ludicrous Universe (short story)|Another Day, Another Ludicrous Universe]]'' is a coda to this story. It reveals that Second Noodle Man II seemingly survived the destruction of Earth.

== Behind the scenes ==
=== Read online ===
The story was originally released on Archive of Our Own [https://archiveofourown.org/works/57637321 here].

[[Category:Stories]]
[[Category:Prose Stories]]
[[Category:Short Stories]]
[[Category:Surviving Stories]]
[[Category:Written by Xavier Llewellyn]]
[[Category:Released in 2024]]